Hi Everyone! Wow, I haven’t blogged in a bit, but it feels so good to be back! I have just been so busy trying to balance what seems like a zillion things at once (I don’t even think that is a real word!). Sometimes, I cannot imagine life getting much busier…and we don’t even have kids yet!
I have spent the last hour or so making a new thumbnail for an upcoming Youtube video I made and I can’t help being so happy. I am happy not because I have a zillion (there it is again) followers, because in reality I have 25, but I am happy because it is MINE! I have drifted back and forth between knowing who I am and then losing sight of it. I feel like there is something about being a BIG person – working and pay bills, that makes you feel a little robotic.
Does anyone else get this feeling? It is like each day is the same or close too. I get up exhausted, go to work, work hard, come home exhausted, pick up the house, play with my doggy, watch TV, play on social media, stay up too late, and repeat. Seriously though! The days feel so short that I feel like I lose myself in it. I lose my hobbies, my passion, my desire for more than just making sure my mortgage is payed—-which is VERY important! I kinda like living here!!
I started this channel 10 months ago! Some of my videos are less than good because I had no option other than filming from my phone. Then they got a little better as I learned how to use my little digital camera. Then a little better as I played around with editing. Now, I am jumping for joy because we worked and saved so that I could get a new camera and upgrade my editor!!
I am thrilled as I sit here editing my first video shot with my new camera! It is so clear and it has a selfie screen. Gone are the days of propping my little digital camera against a mirror, holding another mirror, and watching the clock all at once to make sure that A.) I am actually in the shot and B.) that I know when the camera is going to die at the 8 minute mark! Yes, I am thrilled that my videos are FAR from perfect even with my new camera, but I am learning!!
I am learning these things that I once kind of knew, but forgot because they got pushed a side by life. I am so thrilled that I have pushed myself out of my comfort zone by putting ME out there for the world to possibly judge. I am just so excited that I am finally deciding to do something for me. This channel is something to look forward to because I am showing my creative passions. My videos may not be perfect, but DAMMIT I am learning!